Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
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