just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
