I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
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