"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
Sober January is a disaster.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
