I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
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