Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Randomize
