if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
