why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
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