she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
Randomize
