He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
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