just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Randomize
