guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
my sisters under your porch take her home
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
Randomize
