thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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