She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
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