I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
