I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
they need to just BURY HIM!
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Randomize
