if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?