i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize