i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.