Joe is yelling at the trees again.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
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