dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
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