i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
