Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
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