So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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