I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize