im drinking this country out of the recession.
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
I need to stop coming to work sober
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nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
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Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.