Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
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