so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
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You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
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Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
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