Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
