So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize
