So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
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