Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
