i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
