Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Randomize
