All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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