Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Randomize
