John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Randomize