So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
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