WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
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He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
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My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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