What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
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she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
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You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
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