I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
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