if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
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