I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Randomize
