I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
