hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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