Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
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