I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
