Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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