In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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