Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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