i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
